Auto and Twilight Review!

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Today's review:

Portal and Portal 2

GLaDOS: Hello. And. Again. Welcome to Auto and Twilight's Review of the Portal games.

Auto: "Haha! Thanks GlaDOS. Hey y'all, how ya doin'? I'm Auto, a gamer. And with me is my lovely fillyfriend-"

Twi: "Twilight Sparkle. Not a gamer, but still interested in the hobby!"

Auto: "And as you may have guessed by now, today we're starting off this series with a review of the Portal series of games. All two of them."

Twi: "Since Auto finished the games recently, we thought that it would be good to review them together."

Auto: "Now that I think about it, this kinda follows Portal 2's marketing gimmick of 2-P co-op. Nice."

Twi: "The way this is going to work, is I'm going to talk about the technical aspects of the games, such as mechanics and graphics; and Auto will go into things such as the game's story and music, and how such things affect the overall experience."

Auto: "So to be a gentlecolt, I'll let Twi go first."

Twi: "Aw, thanks! You're so sweet! So, let's start with Portal one.

"Portal one introduces the series' main mechanic, shown in game as the Aperture Science Dual Portal Device, also known as the Portal Gun. The function of the device is to shoot one colored portal in one spot, and another colored portal in another spot, but only on certain panels of walls, ceilings, and such. The player then goes through one portal to end up coming out the second one. Fairly basic concept, but it really works. Other objects can move through the portals as well, which is required to solve most of the puzzles.

"There are other mechanics as well, such as placing one portal at the top of a room, placing the other at the bottom of the room, and jumping into the portal at the bottom to go flying out the one at the top. You see, this is due to the laws of momentum. The portal system keeps the velocity of your body as it goes into the one portal, and-"

Auto: "In layman's terms: speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out."

Twi: "....if you want to put it bluntly, then yes. That's what happens.

"Mechanics wise, there's not much to talk about. There are some puzzles that require you to send an energy ball into a power socket of some kind to open a door or something, but that's about it. More mechanics were introduced in the second game, which we'll talk about in a bit.

"Graphics wise, the game is pretty basic. Or so Auto tells me. The detail is a bit lacking. But seeing as the game was released in two thousand six, and graphical technology then wasn't like it is now. They had pretty limited equipment, so that can be forgiven. The particle effects of the portals are nice, as are other things. Again, not too much to talk about.

"I now hand it off to Auto."

Auto: "Thanks babe.

"The point of the game is to stimulate your mind by having you solve puzzles using only the two portals. But unlike most games, which would give you a limited number of portal re-locations and a time limit, Valve's game let's you take your time with solving the puzzle, and you can move portals an infinite number of times. This helps people like me, who need to do things a lot before figuring it out.

"Now, I will not be afraid to say that I am mostly against puzzle based games. To me, the gameplay is boring, and it's really hard to figure things out on a time limit. But when you take that concept, eliminate limitations, and put it in a first-person perspective, I can really get behind it.

"But a game with just puzzles is boring. How about a nice story to go with it?

"The story of Portal one is, again, basic as heck. You play an unnamed and unvoiced test subject that is being forced to go through these testing chambers in order to get the Portal Gun out of beta, and onto the open market. Or so the game's credits played theme song "Still Alive" suggests.

"Throughout the 19 test chambers of the game, you talk with GlaDOS, the facility's super computer. She will keep you company by giving you very subtle hints as to what you are meant to do, and she also exposits a bit on the backstory of the game.

"The company is called Aperture Science, a rival of Half-Life's science company Black Mesa. Which works because Portal is basically a spin-off of Valve's other, longer running series. GlaDOS has killed off most (if not all) of the scientists, who were trying to shut her down when they found out that she was making the tests too dangerous for humans to use.

"So throughout the levels, as you go along, GlaDOS lies to you about the facility, and promises you cake at the end of the testing. Yeah, I think you know the meme."

Twi: "The cake! It's a lie! There is no cake! THE CAKE IS A LIE!"

Auto: "Exactly.

"So when GlaDOS tries to incinerate you near the end, you escape and go to shut her down. This is harder than it sounds. To get to her, you have to travel through the maze-like back areas of the Aperture facility. All the while looking at that red light from hell. WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?! What, did they sell their souls to the devil or something?! WHY!?"

Twi: "Honey, you're getting off track."

Auto: "....fine.

"Anyway, you eventually get to GlaDOS, knock off the spheres attached to her, destroy those, and she eventually self-destructs. You are then shown to be dragged away by a robotic being that is never, ever mentioned in the next game.

"To sum up my views on the first game's story, I actually kinda like it better than something like Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. Portal's is simple, but fun. Even if the game is short, it's worth it just for the the story.

"Audio, audio. Let's start with the voice work.

"The main character, who was named Chell after Portal came out (I think) is unvoiced, as I said earlier. GlaDOS, the antagonist, is voiced in the English version of the game by Ellen McLain, who also sang "Still Alive" and the second game's theme, "Want You Gone". As well as voicing the Turrets and personality cores. Her voice was roboticized in editing. McLain has done work for Valve before, doing voices for Half-Life 2 and it's two sequels. She later did the announcer in Team Fortress 2.

"McLain did a very good job in portraying GlaDOS as the "computer that went insane". It was very entertaining, and the delivery was timed very well, especially in the next game when she had some jokes with another speaking character.

"In all, the voice work is basic. As is the rest of the game. I'm not sure as to exactly why it's so basic, but it works, for whatever reason.

"The music of the game....hm....

"Well, there seems to only be enough to set the mood of an area. For example, when you're going through the back workings of Aperture, there's this very faint music that gives the place a creepy feel. Or when you're about to get incinerated, a male choir sings a pretty intimidating song that gives you the feeling of danger.

"For the most part, though, I didn't really hear any music. And not because I wasn't wearing my headphones with the sound muted. I had the sounds on, and there wasn't much music. There were those radios, but they were rare. Maybe I was just concentrating so hard that my ears blocked out all sound? I don't know.

"The song that plays at the end during the credits, "Still Alive", is very popular on the internet. And I can see why. It's a great song. But it's not my cup of worms. To me, it's not really one that I personally would download off of iTunes for keeping. Don't get me wrong, it's great. It's just not my personal tastes. It's doesn't give me a euphoric reaction like, say, 2112 by Rush. But I'd recommend it to a friend in a heart beat if they wanted a good video game song to listen to, or play on an instrument. But it's still good.

"To finish, the experience I received from the first game was good, overall. The controls are standard for a first-person game, so it's easy to get used to. The game itself is good, even if a little short compared to most other games that I've played. The story is well crafted, as is the expansion to it shown in the next game. The aesthetic look of the game passes off the science-fiction-but-still-based-in-reality feel very nicely.

"I have very few complaints with the game, other than this one spot that took flippin' ages to get past. If you've played Portal, you know what I'm talking about. Having to jump into a vent like that. Those jerks.

"Overall, if I had to rate this, I'd give it....an eight out of ten, if only for the fact that it has that one spot. GRR!

"I now hand it back to Twi for Portal 2."

Twi: "Thanks.

"Portal two's mechanics are basically taken straight from the first game. No polish was needed, thankfully.

"The second game adds in a few new mechanics for solving puzzles at about the half-way point in the game. These are the gels that you master in the old Aperture facilities far below the modern one. The gels are a very nice addition to the game, and provide tons more opportunities for levels.

"The three gels are the blue repulsion gel that makes you bounce, the orange propulsion gel that makes you run faster, and the white portal gel that can turn non-portal surfaces into portal surfaces. Again, these provide more options than just portals alone.

"Another new mechanic is the Light-bridge. These are solid bridges made of pure light that you can walk on. And turrets cannot detect you through them, which is really good.

"There are the Aerial Faith Plates, which are basically catapults. Nothing else to say, aside from the fact that they launch you into the air.

"The energy balls from the first game have now been replaced with redirection-able lasers, which is a new mechanic as well. Most of the puzzles in the modern Aperture facility use these in some way. The lasers can also burn the turrets."

Turret: "I'm on fire! (boom!)"

Auto: "Love doing that! So satisfying! How do you like me now that I have a weapon also, motherbuckers?! HAHA!"

Twi: "Auto, please."

Auto: "Sorry. Please continue."

Twi: "Anyway.

"The final new mechanic added to the game is a system of these funnel-type-things. I'm not sure what they are, exactly, but they're a new mechanic. The funnel grabs things into it, and moves them along. It's more like a tractor beam than a funnel, but they call them funnels in the game, so what can you do? Certain buttons can reverse the flow of the funnel, turning the blue aura that pushes into an orange one that pulls. That's fun. Objects and gels can be put inside, which is required for a couple tests near the end of the game.

"These new mechanics are pretty clever, and add a lot of positives to the game as a whole.

"The graphics are a huge step up from the first game. Models in the game, be they character models or not, have much closer attention to detail. You can tell that the facility is falling apart, you can see the decay of the old facilities, and it is very well done.

"I hand it over to Auto to wrap up the review."

Auto: "Thanks.
"So, the story in this game not only expands on the story from the first game, it also makes this game maybe twice as long. It's pretty great!

"The game officially starts when the personality core named Wheatley comes in to check in on the player's character, Chell. After going through the storage area that GlaDOS used for holding test subjects, Chell goes through a good portion of the old tests from the beginning of the first game. The only difference is that some apocalypse or something has taken place, and the majority of the modern Aperture facility is over grown with plant life. But, thanks to Deus Ex Machina, the testing can continue.

"So Wheatly attempts to help Chell get out of the facility by leading her to the Portal gun. In it's single shot mode. (facehoof) Seriously, what good is a Single Portal Device going to do? Dang.

"Anyway, to get out, the two have to go through GlaDOS' chamber. Thankfully the personality core opens up a short cut, meaning you don't have to play the first game again to continue the second. After arriving in GlaDOS' chamber, Wheatly accidentally re-activates GlaDOS. And she kills him, throws you down the now inactive incinerator, and forces you to grab the Dual Portal Device to continue testing.

"As you go through the new levels that introduce the lasers, Aerial Faith Plates, and light-bridges, GlaDOS starts to repare the facility. As you go, you occasionally see a familiar blue robot eye that will stare at you for a bit, then leave. Turns out, Wheatly isn't dead! Yay! So Wheatly helps you escape GlaDOS, and you go to hinder her ability to stop you when you go to replace her.

"The first stop is the turret production line. Seems that there are multiple defective turrets that get thrown out, so you use one of them as a template for all the others. The next stop is the neurotoxin generator, which is shut down by Chell as she makes it implode.

"After this, you ride in a tube all the way to GlaDOS to confront her. With a little bit of resistance, you manage to replace her with Wheatly, who then calls up a lift to get you back to the surface. But Wheatly soon goes mad with power. After forcing GlaDOS into a potato battery, he slams you into a pit, where you fall into the old Aperture Science facilities, dating as far back as nineteen fifty-eight.

"So Chell works her way through the old facility, finding GlaDOS along the way. Many things are reviled down there. I'm not going to spoil it for you though, just in case you haven't played the game or haven't seen a playthrough of the game on YouTube or something.

"So after leaving the old Aperture area, which introduced the gels by the way, you and GlaDOS head up to stop Wheatly and set things right. You eventually do so, and GlaDOS sets you free after defeating Wheatly. She even sends up the burned up companion cube from Portal one as a little souvenir."

Twi: "How nice of her!"

Auto: "Yeah. So that's where the game ends. This story makes the game significantly longer than the first one. And the expansion on the story of a spin-off is a great idea that I wish more game companies would do.

"There seems to be more music in this game than the first one. The mood the music sets lets you know that it's the same Aperture, but something is a bit off in each area. Example, the old Aperture area's mood music says 'Hey! This is Aperture! But old! I wonder what kind of mysteries this place holds.'

"It really works. There are musical effects in this game that play when you do a certain action as well, such as running on the propulsion gel. These additions make the game much more immersive.

"The voice work is, to quote, absolutely fantastic! Ellen McLain reprises her roles as GlaDOS and the turrets, as well as taking on a new role. Again, I don't want to spoil it for those that haven't played it yet.

"Wheatly is played by Stephen Merchant, who is an English writer and comedian, among other things. Merchant is mostly active in TV and film. Portal 2 was his first video game role ever, as far as I know. And Valve couldn't have gotten a better actor. With Merchant being a professional comedian, he has a perfect understanding of how to time the punchlines. And it so works! He and McLain work off each other perfectly in the parts where GlaDOS and Wheatly are in the same room together, and are speaking to each other. Even when he's the only one there he's entertaining to listen to! He portrays Wheatly perfectly.

"The aesthetics of the game are wonderful. As stated, when something looks like it should be falling apart, it looks like it's falling apart. I can really tell the age of old Aperture. Everything seems much more realistic than the first game, but it still has that sci-fi feel to it that I love.

"Again, there really aren't any complaints on my end. I had a few lag issues with single player, but that's due to my computer having a lot of crap on it. I haven't played multi-player yet, though. Twi and I might update this when I do."

Twi: "We definitely will."

Auto: "Overall, if I had to rate it, I'd give it a nine out of ten. It's not the best game of all time, no. But I think we can all agree that it's one of, if not the best game this decade. So far. It's at least better than a lot of other crap out there."

Twi: "I think it's time to sign off now. I don't want you going on another rant."

Auto: "Fine. Thank you all for reading, folks! Hope you enjoyed this first review!"

Twi: "And if you have any feedback and/or constructive criticism, please leave it in the comments! We'd love to hear it!"

Auto: "So for Twilight Sparkle, I'm Auto reminding you that it's okay to play games."

Twi: "And if you have a better catchphrase than that, send it in to us and we'll look into it."

Auto: "Hey!"

Twi: "See you next time!"